SASH Conference

The 2005 SASH Conference was held in San Francisco, California this year.  Around 400 therapists gathered to share ideas and to listen to a vareity of speakers talk about how to create a culture of healthy sexuality.  There were many highlights to this conference including a panel discussion addressing the question of “What is Healthy Sexuality?” Sex Addiction Los Angeles

There was lively discussion around that question and a movement by members of both SASH (Society for the Advancement of Sexual Health) and AASECT (American Association of Sex Educators and Therapists) to come together in a dialogue to look for similarities and ways to build bridges.

I believe that this kind of coming together can only bode well for the profession of psychotherapy and for the future of sex education in this country.

For more information about the conference and these organizations, visit their sites at and

Is a Sex Coach for You?

Do you feel shameful about your sexuality?  Are you embarrased by your body?  Do you feel like you “fumble the ball” sexually?  You might need to talk to a therapist or a sexual coach in order to feel more cofident and sure of yourself.

One such person is Dr. Patti Britton.  She can help you heal the shame that blocks your sexuality through her sexual coaching program.  She writes:

“If you feel there’s something shameful, bad or wrong about your sexuality, let’s work together to change that. I can coach you to become a skilled lover and a sexually empowered person. It’s time for you to claim your divine birthright to experience, enjoy and express your uniqueness as a sexual being. It’s time for you to have the ultimate pleasure that you deserve. It’s time to heal the blocks that prevent you from being all that you can be, sexually.” Sex Addiction Los Angeles

You can consult her by going to her web site at

If you contact her, let us all know what your experience was like by clicking on the comments button below.

For Partners of Sex Addicts

COSA is an anonymous 12-Step fellowship for those whose lives have been
affected by another¹s compulsive sexual behavior.  Our 12 Steps and 12
Traditions are based on those of Alcoholics Anonymous; but we have no
affiliation with AA.  Members of our program acknowledge their own disease
of sexual codependency/co-sex addiction/co-addiction and begin the journey
to newfound serenity in their lives.  COSA is not a therapy group, nor is it
designed to replace our need for professional therapy.  Often times, members
working the 12 Steps of COSA are able to follow through with honesty while
continuing to work with a professional. Sex Addiction Los Angeles

COSA cooperates with, but is not affiliated with Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA)
and our annual conventions are running concurrently in 2006. Attendance and
participation at a national convention offers a unique opportunity, for new
and seasoned members alike, to grow in their knowledge of the program by
attending meetings, workshops and speaker presentations.  We encourage all
of those who qualify to attend.

The COSA 2006 National Convention will be held in Indianapolis, IN, over
Memorial Day weekend, May 23-26, 2006.  On behalf of the COSA National
Service Organization (COSA NSO), I would like to encourage you to attend the
informational session during the upcoming SASH conference if you plan to
attend, and to share this information with patients and colleagues.

For more information about the meet and greet session and the COSA 2006
National Convention, or about COSA in general, please email our Public
Information Committee at

We would like to encourage
those who are unfamiliar with COSA, or who have additional questions about
our fellowship, to visit our website at
Thank you for your help in reaching those who still suffer.

In Service,

Christi G.
Chair, COSA National Service Organization

SAA Literature

If you’re struggling with sexually compulsive behaviors and need some help, contact your local Sex Addict’s Anonymous meetings by clicking on the button on this site.  If you don’t have meetings in your area, you can always attend an Alcoholic’s Anonymous meeting but abide by the tenants of SAA.  One way to find out what those are is to get the SAA literature.  For SAA literature you can go to this site and purchase what you need for a nominal fee: Good luck with your recovery!

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Sex Addiction: You’re not alone

If you are a sex addict and want to read about other people’s struggles with their compulsive sexual behaviors or write about your own, check out This is a little like having a virtual group therapy experience. Sex Addiction Los Angeles.  You may really relate to a story and see that you aren’t alone and your contributions could really help another.  Let me know how it goes by clicking the comment button below.  Thanks!

What about female sex addicts?

I want to be clear that I mostly consider myself to be a social liberal and that I don’t have big opinions about what’s strictly “right” and “wrong” for people.  So if people don’t have a problem with their sexual behaviors, then I don’t.  However, if someone says “I’m in a lot of pain because of my sexual behaviors and I can’t stop,” then I’m available to help. Sex Addiction Los Angeles

That said, it seems to me that women often get left behind when talking about sex addiction. I think that’s partially because women are continually trying to define what sex and sexual liberation means to them after centuries of sexual repression.  I also think that women don’t come into treatment for sexual addiction due to the shame and stigma attached to admitting to such a problem.

However, the thinking today seems to be, if men can have a lot of casual sex, why can’t women?   The TV series, “Sex in the City” really put that out on the air waves.  What Samantha and the gang were up to would not have been cool if the cast were all men.  They were glamourous, promiscious and proud of it.  I guess I worry that women could be getting themselves into trouble and not recognizing it.

Take a look at this article and see what you think.

Sex Addiction with Jason Grayves

You can listen to Jason Grayves talk about Sex Addiction in a three-part series on World Talk Radio.

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Let me know how you like the show by clicking on the comments button below.

What is “healthy sex” anyway?

How often have you said “We don’t have sex that much anymore.  I wish I had more intimacy with my partner, I wish we were closer.”  After saying that have you been willing to take a good, hard look at yourself and what YOU do to prevent intimacy from happening?

People often want their partners to change.  They think that if their partner would just be this way or that, then all their intimate and sexual problems would be solved.  Well, good luck with that one!!

It seems that great sex evolves out of deep intimacy.  Really being willing to admit  the ways you knowingly dig at your partner, get defensive, make accusations or blame is hard work.

Are you willing to step out of your comfort zone and let your partner know who you really are?  Can you tolerate the upheavel, confrontation and anxiety that goes with being truely vulnerable?  If the answer is yes, then great sex is within reach.  Because being vulnerable and real allows for a wonderful closeness.  Then true sexual desire and eroticism blossom.  If the answer is “no” then you have to live with the discomfort of knowing that you won’t get what you want.  You choose!

Let me know what you think about this topic and for couple’s workshops and more on how to become sexually vital with your partner, go to

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More on Sexual Anorexia

Kirsten Rogoff, MA states that “Persons suffering from Sexual Anorexia tend to avoid sex.  There are different ways this problem can manifest itself. It can be as extreme as complete avoidance from any type of sexual pleasure, including masturbation, or as subtle as limiting sexual expression to anonymous sexual encounters.”

She states that “often times there is an underlying social phobia or extreme shyness and/or there could have been a devasting rejection or trauma that resulted in subsequent avoidant behavior.  There are many reasons why avoidant behaviors exist, but most often regardless of the original cause, there seems to be a resulting fear of intimacy that lies at the heart of the problem.”

“Sometimes the risk of criticism and rejection is too great to bear, so the individual withdraws in self-imposed exile from the human race.  Social skills may be so impoverished that the person may have to be taught how to shop, cook, have a conversation with others, and other basic skills.”

For more information on this topic you can contact Ms. Rogoff at or visit her site at Please click the “comment” button to contribute to this discussion.

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More on Cybersex

Here’s another article on cybersex addiction you might find interesting.

Sex Addiction Los Angeles